The goo in you

August 24, 2023

The Goo in You

Just write.

What is already in me? Courage. Presence. Compassion.

I don't know what to write.

Transformation from oppressed corporate employee to social activist.  ?

Maybe I don't need to transform into something with a title. I will be who I am, and I will do good for others being who I am.

I don't need a title. I will be me. The me I am supposed to be.

Have I been searching for a title? Does that equate to searching for value. Who am I? How do I provide value? I have to figure that out, right. Maybe not.

I just need to be me.

Be interested in what I'm interested in. Be motivated to learn what I want to learn. Become me.

The me I am meant to be. The one I'm already carrying around with me. Let that me be me.

This conversation is hard to follow since it is me speaking to me. This was the start of many conversations with myself. Later, they became more formal, with character dialogue and pleasantries. More on that later.

I wrote this after listening to the Podcast "Goo and You" by RadioLab. This explains what happens inside a pupa when a caterpillar turns into a butterfly. It's interesting and amazing, and you should listen to it. I started to embrace the goo that I was in. I started removing my perfect-Meggan-mask and wallowing in whatever remained underneath. I dreamed of letting pieces of me flourish that had always been suppressed and giving strength to pieces that needed support.

I realized I could use this time to express a part of myself that I had always known was there but rarely revealed to others. I wasn't sure what that would look like, so I struggled to give it a title. I stuck with "living in the goo" for several months.

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