I have a confidence problem - follow up

Success!!

I have been intentionally taking up more space and time. My experiment has proven that those actions do not hurt others around me. Granted, I still obey traffic laws and adhere to most people's definition of personal space. So, I can't fully say that this would still be the case if I completely ignored societal laws. But here's the point: I have spread myself out just a little more into the world, outside my comfort zone, and found that there is space for me!

Not only have I taken up more space and time, but I've also been sitting a little straighter and using my voice a little stronger. 

In my last entry, I talked about the Stanford class I am taking, which is called "Building Power to Lead." In that class, we learned Power Skills, and taking up more space is one of those Power Skills. The class teaches Power Skills as a way to project power and use that power to influence others to get what you want. Through the experiment I developed, I am convinced I can use these Power Skills to build inner strength. This inner strength will allow me to move forward toward my life goals, not by projecting power, but by confidently being myself. For my final class project, I created a video sharing the story of my learning journey and the distinction between power and inner strength. Here is a snippet from the script...

"Through my life experiences, I have seen power given and taken from those I worked closely with. I have been given power, and it has been taken away. I have learned from those experiences that power is fleeting and the holes in our lives that it fulfills are temporary. Professor Pfiffer’s admirable dedication to researching and bringing awareness of these power skills can also be used to grow individual strength. This strength is longer lasting and more fulfilling. “Power will always be restricted to a relatively small number of selected persons. Anyone can be strong.” This is a quote from the book Finite and Infinite Games by James Carse. Power can indeed be used to win the finite, short-term game that you may be playing. The game I am playing does not need to be won. It is an infinite game that grows through connections with people. This game will continue long after I can no longer play. I want to use my inner strength to push the playing field forward while I am able, allowing others to play a better game."

A quote from another book states, "Playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that others won't feel insecure around you." Reflecting on this, I realize that I was holding back—avoiding standing out or getting in anyone’s way. However, this approach does not help me achieve what I want to contribute to the world—confidently using my internal strength will.

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